Southern Movements (not bowel)

As this is the first post from the southern army I thought I (the captain and sole member of this branch of our elite organization) should post some messages (coded for safety of course...not that our army isn't unstoppable anyway) about the anking-flay ovement-may that the outhern-say rmy-ay is making. Unfortunately, I'm slightly confused about our mission and its fucking hot down here and the locals speak some strange dialect which I can make neither heads nor tails of (they seem friendly so far {feeding me strange clear liquids and providing me sustenance in the form of fried balls of bread dough} but I fear that, if reinforcements do not get here soon, they will find out that I am only a man playing a god and may become so angered as to do harm to my body). Please send help or cheese immediately...